Updated: Jul 26, 2021
Dear past self,
I know it’s hard to see the positive in all of this right now but trust me it gets better. Seventeen is a young age to lose someone at, and right now you’re wondering “will I make it there myself”. You will, and eighteen, nineteen, and twenty and so on too. I know right now it’s really hard for you but this experience will shape you into who you are today, into who I am. Losing your brother, even if it was only a bond created through friendship and proximity, is one of the hardest things you can go through. You are a strong bull headed girl with big dreams. We will never stop being stubborn, and I will never forget my dreams. Life did not go exactly how we had planned and that is really hard, but we are happier for it. So many people have been along for your epic journey. Sadly, many of the friends who helped you through the hardest time in your life are no longer there for you. You'll realize that it was their toxicity dragging you down and keeping you from healing the wounds on your heart and brain. Even so, we have a lot of work before we are anywhere near healed. So for now, here’s the answer to your question: life is worth living and your hardships are what make you, you and me, me.